روانشناس ابراهیم رجب پور
روانشناس ابراهیم رجب پور
روانشناسی بالینی
نه روش برای تسلیم شدن کودکان لجباز
نوشته شده توسط: ابراهیم رجب پور در ۰۹ مهر ۱۳۹۱ ساعت ۱۷:۱۷
سر و کار داشتن با یک کودک خودسر و لجباز می تواند باعث برهم ریختن آرامش و از کوره در رفتن شما گردد. کودکان لجباز توان و انرژی زیادی برای کشمکش و از پای درآوردن والدین خود دارند. کلید حل چنین مسئله ای این نیست که شما هم نیروی مبارزه با یک کودک نافرمان را کسب کنید.
در لیست زیر ۹ موقعیت که شما می توانید برای تقویت بیشتر همراهی و همکاری با فرزند تان از آن استفاده کنید آمده است.
۱) از ارتباط مثبت استفاده کنید.
سعی کنید نظراتتان را به جای بیان در یک قالب منفی به شکل مثبت ابراز کنید. برای مثال اگر فرزند شما می گوید:" من می توانم حالا تلویزیون ببینم ؟ " به جای کاربرد فقط کلمه " نه ، نمی توانی " بگویید:" شما می توانید بعد از شام تلویزیون تماشا کنید " یا " من می توانم این برنامه را ضبط کنم تا شما بعد از شام آن را ببینید."
2) برای کودک خود دو انتخاب ایجاد کنید.
به عنوان یک ولّی شما می توانید دو گزینه را که هر دو بطور مساوی رضایت شما را فراهم می سازد انتخاب کنید و به فرزند خود پیشنهاد دهید. اگر کودک این احساس را پیدا کند که او هم بر اوضاع موجود کنترل دارد، احتمال این که نافرمانی یا سرپیچی از خود نشان دهد کم خواهد بود.
۳) احساس خود را به کودک منتقل کنید.
گاهی اوقات نشان دادن حس دلسوزی به کودک بوسیله انتقال این حس چیزی است که برای او مفید واقع می شود. مثلاً وقتـی بیــان می کنید :
" عصبانیت الان شما کاملا به جاست چون نمی توانید ساختن این برج اسباب بازی را تمام کنید . این سخت است کاری را قبل از به پایان رساندن آن رها کنید . این طور نیست ؟"
۴) به آنها آنچه را که می بینید بگویید و چیزی را که مایلید آنها انجام دهند بیان کنید.
" وای، شما واقعاً دوست دارید نه بگویید. من عاشق لحظاتی هستم که کودکی می گوید بله بله بله ."چنین جمله ای همراه با کمی شوخ طبعی و بازی با کودک کلمه بله را برای شما به ارمغان می آورد.
۵ خواسته هایتان را به صورت یک حکم بیان کنید نه یک سوال.
به عنوان مثال اغلب والدین در برخورد با فرزند خود و تکالیف مدرسه اش از او می پرسند :" مایلی حالا تکالیفت را انجام دهی ؟" در حالیکه با یک لحن محکم و صریح باید تنها به او گفته شود : " الان زمان انجام تکالیف مدرسه است."
۶) رفتن به یک مکان دیگر را برای او لذت بخش کنید.
اگر کودک شما با تغییر مکان مشکل دارد و در مقابل آن واکنش نشان می دهد از او بخواهید تا قبل از حرکت کمی جست و خیز و بازی کند و یا سی دی مورد علاقه اش را در ماشین داشته باشید تا در طول مسیر به آن گوش دهد.
۷) برای خانه خود قانون وضع کنید.
اگر ساعت ۸ زمان رفتن به رختخواب می باشد پس به راحتی این قانون را اعلام کنید. وقتی در مقابل مخالفت کودک قرار گرفتید به جای بحث و جدل با او باز هم آن را تکرار کنید ، بارها و بارها .
۸) جایزه و تشویق را فراموش نکنید.
به رفتار های مثبت کودک خود بیش از توجه به نکات منفی رفتاری او اهمیت دهید. شما می توانید ظرف یا کوزه ای را تهیه کنید و هر بار که از او کاری را می خواهید و او در همان مرتبه اول آن را انجام می دهد ، تیله رنگی را درون ظرف بیندازید. سپس با کودک خود در مورد جایــزه و تعداد تیله هایی که او برای به دست آوردن آن باید در کوزه داشته باشد ، مشورت کنید.
۹) پیشگیرانه بیندیشید.
بسیاری از بچه ها الگوهای منفی را در خود پرورش می دهند . پس به دنبال آن باشید که محرک های خاص را از آنها دور کنید،عواملی که آنها را لجباز تر می کند . در چنین شرایطی هرچه در تغییر این الگوها بیشتر بکوشید کودک شما به موفقیت نزدیک خواهد گردید.
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شرطی سازی کلاسیک
شرطی سازی متضاد
تست neo
اعتیاد
مراحل ترک اعتیاد
انواع مواد مخدر
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روانشناس
تست های روانشناسی - گرایشات روانشناسی - روانشاسی شناخته شده نیست
آزمونscl90
تاثیر فعالیت های جسمانی بر سلامتی
مدل های ذهنی در رشد اجتماعی
نظریه گوردن الپورت
شرطی سازی متقابل و متضاد
نظریه اسکینر
واتسون ویگوسکی
الپورت
فروید
انا فروید
عقب ماندگی ذهنی
کودکان
بزرگسالان
بیماری
تست های روانشناسی
تست سلامت روان
بازی درمانی
معیارهای سلامت روان
پیشرفت تحصیلی
نظریه فردی ادلر
اختلال مواد
اختلال سلوک
اختلال سلوک در کودکان
رضایت مندی زناشویی
طلاق
اشترینگ برگ
روش های تغییر رفتار
نظریه گلاسر پاولف
شرطی سازی کلاسیک
شرطی سازی متضاد
تست neo
اعتیاد
مراحل ترک اعتیاد
انواع مواد مخدر
طلاق
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